We’re taught that fixing a fight means apologizing. Say sorry, hug it out, move on. But the most important part of repair happens long before anyone gets anywhere near an apology. Think about the state you’re in right after an argument. Your heart is racing. Your thoughts are looping. You’re rehearsing your side, certain you were right, desperate to be understood. In that moment, your body is still in protection mode, and no one can genuinely repair from there. You can force the words “I’m sorry